WHOLAHAY

NO MORE EXCUSES

2008-04-14T16:19:35Z

WHAT UP, BITCHES!!!

YOU MIGHT BE WOND'RIN WHERE THE HAYELL MY DUMB ASS IS AT. WELL I DECIDED TO GET 2 JOBS 'CUZ I REALLY NEED TO SAVE MY MONEY INSTEAD OF SPENDING IT ON MCFLURRIES. THOSE THINGS ARE SO DAMN GOOD THOUGH. MCDONALD'S MIGHT BE GUILTY OF ALL SEVEN DEADLY SINS BUT YOU WOULD GO OVER TO THE DARK SIDE TOO IF YOU HAD A DAMN COLD SWEET MCFLURRY AFTER BUSTIN' YOUR ASS IN A HOT OFFICE ALL DAY. MMMM HMMMM.

I AM EVEN BEHIND ON CELEB GOSSIP. DID THAT NICOLE RICHIE HAVE HER KID YET? AND HALLE BERRY? AND WHO ELSE IS PREGNANT? DAYUM! I DON'T EVEN KNOW.

WORK, DAMMIT

2008-03-28T15:54:28Z

MY LIFE:

SCHOOL

WORK

SCHOOL

WORK

SCHOOL

WORK

WORK

SCHOOL

DAYUM I FEEL LIKE PETER FUCKIN' PARKER. EXCEPT I AM NOT A GODDAMN SUPERHERO... WELL ACTUALLY I COULD BE.

AU REVOIR, BITCHES

2008-03-04T01:34:15Z

J/K

SRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A WHILE, I'VE BEEN SO DAYUM BUSY. BUT GUESS WHAT, I BE GETTIN' MY EYEBROWS THREADED FOR THE FIRST TIME ON WEDNESDAY. OOOOOH WEEE, I'M SURE IT'LL HURT LIKE A MOTHA. BUT I BE NEEDIN' THESE CATERPILLARS DOWNGRADED TO.... UM.... SOMETHING SMALLER THAN CATERPILLARS. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

PEACE OUT, HOMIES.

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE

2008-02-22T20:32:28Z

I BE STAYIN' HOME TODAY 'CUZ I BE SICK AS HAYELL.

BE WAKIN' UP FEELIN' LIKE 12000 GODDAMN KNIVES SHOVED DOWN MY THROAT AND MY SINUS BE MORE CLOGGED THAN TYRA BANKS'S ARTERIES.

DAYUM. LEAST I CAN EAT ICE CREAM FOR DINNER 'CUZ NO WAY MY SICK ASS GONNA BE COOKIN' SHIT. FUCK DAT CHICKEN SOUP SHIT. MMM HMMM

ALL Y'ALL BITCHES EVIL

2008-02-20T18:35:47Z

SO AFTER 'BOUT 10 HOURS OF EXCRUTIATIN' PAIN, MY DUMB-ASS THUMB BE GETTIN' ALL THE PAIN GONE. STILL GOT THAT FUG-ASS WELT. BUT THEN I BE DECIDIN' TO MAKE A CHEESECAKE FOR A POTLUCK TONIGHT.

IT BE LOOKIN' ALL FUG-ASS AN' BROKE-DOWN BUT IT STILL BE GOOD.

YOU MIGHT BE WOND'RIN' WHY DA HAYELL I BE EATIN' A CHEESECAKE FOR A POTLUCK. WELL I BE HAVIN' TO EAT 'DIS MYSELF 'CUZ MY DUMB ASS FRIEND BE ASKIN' ME TO MAKE A GODDAMN SALAD 'CUZ HE GOT FREE CAKES. FUCK DAT SHIT, I AIN'T CUTTIN' UP NO GODDAMN VEGGIES AND 'DIS CHEESECAKE BE TAKIN' ME TWO HOURS TO MAKE.

I JUST BE PICKIN' UP SOMETHIN' FROM 7-11.

MMMM HMMM.

IF IT LOOKS JANK, I'LL BE MAD

2008-02-19T15:23:18Z

O SHIT SON.

MY STUPID ASS THUMB BE CAUGHT IN THE CLOSET DOOR THIS MORNIN'. IT AIN'T BE LOOKIN' LIKE MUCH BUT IT BE HURTIN' LIKE HAYELL. OOOOOOOOOHWEE!

AIN'T EVEN ABLE TO USE MY GODDAMN THUMB 'CUZ IT BE HURTIN SO MUCH AND I BE A RIGHTY. WHAT DA HAYELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? DAMN OPPOSABLE THUMB BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED. DAYUM.

GOD DON'T LIKE UGLY

2008-02-18T21:56:13Z

TODAY I GONE TO THE DRUGSTORE AND THEY BE HAVIN' VALENTINE'S CANDY ON SALE. I JUST BE PICKIN' UP THE LAST BAG OF HERSHEY'S MINI BARS TO READ THE NUMBER OF GODDAMN CALORIES. THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN SOME NASTY OLE' BITCH SNATCHED DEM OUT OF MY HANDS. SO I JUST BE SAYIN', "EXCUSE ME!" AND THEN BITCH SNAPPIN', "YOU WERE JUST LOOKIN' AT DEM." THEN SHE WENT AWAY AND I JUST BE STANDIN' THERE SPUTTERIN' LIKE A DAMN FOOL.

STUPID-ASS HO. I BE HOPIN' SOME NASTY MOFO AT DAT FACTORY REPLACED THE CHOCOLATE WITH BUNNY SHIT.

MMM HMMM.

CHECK YO' THIGHS IN THE MIRROR

2008-02-18T04:37:30Z

MY FAT ASS DID NOT FEEL LIKE COOKIN' SO I DECIDED TO EAT ABOUT 8 WERTHER'S ORIGINALS. OF COURSE MY FAT ASS SHOULD KNOW THAT THOSE DAMN CANDIES AIN'T FULL OF ANY SUBSTANCE. BUT AS A RESULT I NOW FEEL INCREDIBLY NAUSEOUS FROM ALL THE SUGAR. SO MISSION ACCOMPLISHED CUZ I STILL AIN'T HUNGRY NOW.

FIRST OF ALL, I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE A BITCH

2008-01-17T22:10:52Z

I ALWAYS TYPE LIKE THIS.

FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION.

SORRY IF IT ANNOYS YOU.

WE'LL HAVE MAKE-UP SEX LATER.